


Barbie's vay-cay

by Charles_Rockafellor



Category: Barbie, G.I. Joe - All Media Types
Genre: Carnality, Cynicism, Infidelity, Materialism, Vice, military life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:14:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24385645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charles_Rockafellor/pseuds/Charles_Rockafellor
Summary: When Joe's away, Barbie will lay.𝑫𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝑳𝒊𝒌𝒆, 𝑺𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒆, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑺𝒖𝒃𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒃𝒆! ❤️
Relationships: Barbie Roberts / G.I. Joe Colton, Barbie/Ken
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6
Collections: Toxicity, War is Hell





	Barbie's vay-cay

She'd married Joe, a stolid and dependable, useful resource, though possibly only her starter-husband if he didn't make rank quickly enough.

Ken could do any simple job – maybe cabana boy or drug dealer, or even basic construction if it didn't require more thought than toting things around, and probably has done all of these at one point or another in the past – but he happened to work at a surf shop. He was a stoner and had excellent connections to the highest quality organics, hybrids, and flavors. This didn't matter to Barbie, who was far more interested in powdering her nose and having him see to her needs afterward.

What mattered right now was that he was late, as usual.

Barbie paced as she waited for him to arrive. He was always late, which was why she always told him a time two hours earlier than she actually intended. This time was no different, just more irritating. Her plan was to hit their usual motel, taking care of him – preferably twice – as he drove them there, so that he could take care of her thoroughly upon their arrival. He was a two pump chump, otherwise, but such a total beefcake that she could overlook that for now. Especially when she had his brother on the side.

Flicking her perfectly manicured nails once more, she glanced out the window to see that at least Joe hadn't come home early for lunch.

She drilled Ken every day to keep driving past her Malibu mansion if he ever saw the Hummer in the driveway.

Her stomach growled.

She might need something more substantial in her belly than Ken **1** , if he ran much later. She wanted at least an hour of fun before taking him to brunch as eye-candy to make her friends envious as she planned their secret weekend getaway that she intended to tell Joe was just her running off with her friends for a girls' extended night out – she'd probably have to slip a little blue pill into his drink for after brunch, if she and the girls indulged in any further nose candy in the restroom, and she could guarantee that they'd each have a selection to work with, so Ken just might need a few of those little blue pills... **2**

Only twenty minutes left until the time that she intended to leave. Where the hell was he?

And then there was the problem of Joe. She might have to offer him some anal before leaving, to keep his mind occupied on that – let him poke around back there when she got back, fake a few enthusiastic noises, and he'd think that he was special. It would shut him up, and at least she wouldn't have to look at him for a few minutes. Besides, that held the bonus of getting to make him pay for it later.

This cheery thought kept her humming and warm until Ken arrived at last.

  
**O ~~~ O**

**Author's Note:**

>  **1** My impression of her here is that he'd also better not get any in her hair – ever.
> 
>  **2** Anyone care to wager on her opinion of numbing agents and whether she gives a damn (or even a thought) how Ken feels about the reduced sensation?


End file.
